I Have Watched TMZ and People's Court and Made Myself Cheap and Vulgar

I'm finding that morning sickness and unemployment are a dangerous combination. In these early weeks of pregnancy I've adopted an indolence previously reserved only for the day after a good vacation or a bad car accident! Thoreau said you can't kill time without injuring eternity and that sounds plausible to me. I'm scared that Judge Mathis binges and You Tube browsing may be eating my soul!

The good news is that most of the stuff I've read predicts an uptick in energy around week 12, which isn't so far away. Until then I'll try to avoid glowing screens as much as possible. Oh, except for maybe to watch my new prenatal Yoga dvd :)

Pregnant!

I'm ten weeks pregnant! I was going to try to wait until I reached the second trimester to talk about it but I just couldn't. I think about it all day, so keeping it quite is just too much work :P So here's what's been going on with the pregnancy:

The earliest sign was fatigue that set in on June 21st. I thought I was getting sick but no sickness appeared, so on June 28th, when my cycle was about 3 days late, I bought two pregnancy tests. I couldn't test right away because Ross and I had plans to go see Wall-E, but when I cried at the previews I had a pretty good clue what the test was going to say.

When we got home from the movies I went straight to the bathroom with the tests and Ross went upstairs to check his email. He didn't stick around because he was sure I wasn't pregnant! The fist stick immediately displayed two pink lines. For a moment I just stared at it feeling as if the air had been sucked out of me. I didn't know what to do but I had another test so I immediately used it and this time the pregnancy line was even darker. I just started laughing. In that moment I was as joyful as if I'd been trying forever.

But the truth is we hadn't been trying at all, so in the next moment the joy was replaced by fear. I felt weak in the knees, and my head started spinning. For some reason I wandered to the kitchen and back to the bathroom before I remembered Ross. I had to tell him! I slowly climbed the stairs wondering how he would react. When I got to his office I just blurted out that I was pregnant.

He couldn't believe it at first so I took him downstairs to see both tests. For the next 24 hours we were a couple of people in shock. He kept saying "I can't believe you are pregnant" and I kept echoing "I can't believe I'm pregnant." We did manage to go pick up some prenatal vitamins that night and we got online and plugged in my cycle information to get an estimated due date of 3/3/08.

The shock wore off pretty quickly for me because I felt pregnant. Dizzy spells, hunger, cramps and, soon, morning sickness were all impossible to ignore. For Ross it was still a few weeks before he stopped saying "I can't believe you're pregnant." :P

Last week I had my first doctor's visit and it went great! I had an ultrasound and got to see the baby's heart beat. Based on the baby's size, I also got a new due date: 2/28/2009. They printed up a couple of images from the ultrasound and I'm convinced it is the most beautiful ultrasound ever!

If you look at the bottom of the dark jelly bean shaped area in the lower right hand side of the image you can see the baby nestled down there. The big round part on top is the head, the thing that appears to come out of the back is actually the umbilical cord which is coming around from the front on the opposite side, and you can clearly see the curve of the back and the legs. The head can be deceiving because the dark spots resemble facial features but I think it's pretty much impossible for a baby to be looking up at this stage. Instead I think the head is actually tucked down in the normal fetal position and the bright spot on the face is the nose.

At this point kidneys, lungs, genitals and the gastrointestinal tract are all present and developing. Fingers and toes are becoming more defined. Bones are beginning to form in the arms and legs. Baby is just over an inch tall. And yet somehow I'm 7 lbs heavier, lol!

Pictures from my New Camera

Doctor Who: Journey's End Trailer

Bill Hybels Responds to Christianity Today's "Unfortunate Article."

Below is the article Bill and Jim refer to. Parts of it made me laugh out loud when I first read it, it's that bad.

Willow Creek's "Huge Shift" by Matt Branaugh, Christianity Today

Oil Painting Update

Still working on the painting I started last week. Had a disaster with the blanket, had to scrub it off and start over. Even now not happy with the color but, who knows, it may all come together yet. Started a new painting so I'd have something to work on while waiting for layers to dry on the first one.

Oil Painting of Cat - WIP

I've done this subject before as a watercolor, now I'm trying it as an oil painting. It's a cat named Amber and the reference photo is from the WetCanvas library of copyright free images. The painint measures 9"x12".

This painting is on gessoed art board. This is the first time I've tried oil on this surface. I like how smooth it is but one problem is that, without any tooth to hold on to it, the charcoal I used for the under-drawing wouldn't stick! Oh well, next time I'll just do the underdrawing in paint instead. This first picture shows where I have outlined the drawing with a light red and cobalt blue mixture and then blocked in some of the large areas. The blanket will eventually have folds and the background will be darker and there will be a door way in the upper left hand corner, hopefully balancing out the composition a little.

In the second picture I've started to add some of the stripes and markings of the cat. I haven't started adding any highlights yet, that light area in the lower right hand corner is just the light reflecting off the oils in the paint.

Here in the third picture I've started to work in the white fur and the flesh tones of the nose and ears.

In the fourth picture I've continued to refine the white fur, blocked in the eyes, and started to work on some of the pale orange areas like the rings around the eyes the fur on the left side (cat's right side.)

Continued to work on fur, adding stripes and greater texture to fur on breast and refining shape of muzzle and ears. Had to stop at this point because I want to let it dry a little before I started getting into smaller details.

Gay Advocacy Group Meets with Willow Creek Leadership

I don't follow Willow in the news as closely as I used to so this story is a few weeks old, but, if you're interested, I've posted the links below. Both of the articles are from the Tribune. The second one is longer and is followed by passionate comments from readers.

Gay Christians meet with Rev. Bill Hybels and others at Willow Creek Community Church in South Barrington by Robert Mitchum and Manya Brachear

"They listened, they ate with us, when a lot of churches struggle to show hospitality to these groups," he said. Betty Schmidt, an elder at Willow Creek, described Willow as a hospitable congregation, even though the church does not accept gay and lesbian members who don't stay celibate."It's a very warm and welcoming atmosphere," she said. "It would certainly be my experience that we would never single out or identify or discriminate against anyone." Schmidt said she feels strongly that people do not choose to be gay, and many in the Soulforce group said they were happy to hear similar sentiments from several church leaders Sunday.But others said such influential churches as WillowCreek could do more to adjust their views on homosexuality and treatment of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender families.

Willow Creek Welcomes Gay Rights Advocates by Manya Brachear

Betty Schmidt, a longtime elder at Willow Creek, said pastors there simplify the argument by pointing to only one verse, Genesis 2:24: "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."

“Traditionally Christians have founded their basis for human expression for sexuality ... going back to that model,” she said. “That is not a stretch for anyone who adheres to God’s word.”

Willow Creek offers two ministries for gays and lesbians. "A Safe Place" caters to those who are “struggling with same sex attraction” and wish to remain celibate to honor what they believe Scripture teaches. "Someone I Love" counsels families who are grappling with how to accept a gay relative.

Though Willow's Web site offers links to clinics that profess they can alter sexual orientation, Schmidt said that is not the church's mission. If a gay or lesbian Christian wants to join Willow, they must believe that same-sex behavior is a sin and try to remain celibate. The same is true for anyone who might be engaging in sinful behavior, Schmidt said.
"We’re very … welcoming of anyone who comes to the church and is seeking and struggling with whatever it is," Schmidt said. "There’s help in God’s word and help in community and linking up with other Christians.”

Doctor Who

Here's a great video by Ruthybee at YouTube about Donna Noble, the Doctor's latest companion. What a fun addition Catherine Tate has been to this show! (The song is Starlight by Muse.)

This Summer

Here is my list of the top ten things (in no particular order) I'm looking forward to this summer:

1. Morning reading. I've already started doing this and it's my favorite part of the day. I grab a cup of tea and a toaster strudel and then the cats and I go out there sit in the shade of the porch, surrounded by the hum of distant lawn mowers and the twitter of birds. ((((sigh)))

2. Camp Kanuga. Now that I'm a Cangelosi I'm invited to the family reunion out in North Carolina at Camp Kanuga. Mountain waterfalls and hiking and morning crafting classes...I can't wait!

3. 30th Birthday. Yup. It's been looming for such a long time, it will be great to get it over with. And as long as I don't instantly add 15 lbs or lose half my hair I will consider it a happy birthday.

4. The X-Files movie. Once a geek always a geek. I'm looking forward to seeing my old pals Mulder and Scully, and probably cursing the name of Chris Carter for his general clueless-ness.

5. Bicycling. As soon as I realized that we had bought a house two blocks from the bike path I knew I had to buy a bike and get out there. I spent countless hours on the bike path when I was a kid. Now I've got the bike and I am determined to make the most of the path this summer.

6. Neil Diamond concert. Mama has always been a huge Neil Diamond fan so I grew up dancing in my socks to his music. In late July Mama, Dad, Steph and I will be rocking our faces off to Cherry, Cherry.

7. Painting. I can't talk about it too much, don't want to jinx it.

8. The Return of Rose on Doctor Who! I was falling in love with Ross at the same time that Rose and the Doctor were dancing their way though the London Blitz. It was a wonderful time to be alive ;P So I have a soft spot for Rose and I feel bad that things worked out so badly for her when they worked out so well for me. She was sucked into an alternate universe, you know, no Doctor. Now she's coming back and even if it is only for a couple of weeks I'm giddy about it.

9. Being Married. Never been married during summer before!

10. Home Improvements. Having a house is like having a gigantic canvas to work with. There are an infinite number of ways that we can put our stamp on this little corner of the world. I can't wait to see what we do with it this summer.

So that's my list. I'd love to hear what y'all are looking forward to!

Sufjan Stevens - Come Thou Fount (With Aminals!)

Moonlit Reunion

This is another one of my miniature raven paintings. I haven't developed a fascination with ravens or anything, it's just that there is a good demand for them on ebay.